i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
