We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
