I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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