That's intense
she was so not down for the gang bang
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
my liver is dry heaving
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
