Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
