it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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