Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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