We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
