I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
