I don't think brook has ever known best
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
