You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
