That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
