Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Randomize
