so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
