I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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