I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
