Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
