I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize
