If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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