Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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