WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
