I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I need water and some morals
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
