me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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