so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
