I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Randomize