Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
My vagina just recognized that song.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
