very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
