I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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