We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
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