BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
