i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
