Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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