ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
