Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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