accomplished twins. life is a go
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
