You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize