Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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