and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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