How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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