Farmville is her only friend.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
