therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
