Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
