All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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