im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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