is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
either way he was missing a nipple.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
