Pants 0. Shit 1.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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