oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
