Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
This is my gift to your gina
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
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