hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I have post one night stand depression
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