he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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